the learning laboratory at the end
of the universe...
This page is a parking lot. The sentences and snippets
you see here are things that could go farther, if I only had a
If you'd like to add to them or comment on them, click here:
(it's an email link, the light at the end of the tunnel is just for
He woke up
under an elm tree. There was a large smallmouth bass in his pants
The neighbor's wife didn't wear a bra. She was very
She asked herself, "What do I really know". It was
thirty years before she'd thought it through. By then, she was
He always drank two beers between the sermon and the last gospel,
then ran back to the church to take his mom home.
It took half an hour to
get him free from the wiring of the Christmas tree lights so we could get the tree
off his chest and stand him up again.
As old Rene said, "cogito
ergo sum". If I don't think, she doesn't exist. Not quadratic, but it will
do for the morning. Another tooth had gotten rotten, so he drank the
whiskey and took a nap.
He was relieved when the doctors told him he'd
been in a coma for six weeks. That was probably why he hadn't caught any
She was wearing enough makeup to cover a large dolphin.
he came up the stairs from the toilet, the bar was closed.
civilization, he realized he had neither clean underwear nor laundry detergent,
compounded with diarrhea it presented a
When he woke, the ducks were waddling around the kitchen, the floor of
which was deep in their shit. He would have to go downtown for a
The old man had been wandering around for weeks, asking people if they
could spare a kopeck. Since no one in our town knew what a kopeck
was, he was getting very hungry.
She really couldn't stop farting. It had to do with her gastric
condition, which the doctors couldn't quite cure. Their circle of
friends was getting smaller.
Montag, 31. August 2009
It is very difficult to write short stories when you've
confused your fountain pen with a cantalope, but Jack was not a quitter.
He began to write.
Mary was born a slightly different color than her
sisters. She was always thankful for this, but never knew why until the
There was a small pile of antracite coal in the corner
of his bedroom. It was all he had to remember last Christmas, before his
parents ran away from home.
The Atlantic Ocean is much wider than the
creek that runs behind the house. You cannot fish it in waders.
was a Tuesday like any other Tuesday. Yesterday had been Monday and he
remembered that, but he still looked at the calendar to be sure. He was
getting old. He would be twent eight before the next time he looked at the
calendar to be sure it was not still Tuesday.
The way his grandmother
used a vacuum cleaner reminded him of the film "Groundhog Day" without the
Television had been invented before he was born. He was
thiry-two when his father brought their first one home. They couldn't
understand what had happened. It didn't get the Phil Silvers and Jackie
At the back of the little candy store on the corner, there
was a door that led to an opium den. It was there he lost the quarter his
mother had given him to buy Kotex.
The nun fell down the stairs of the
bus, rolled into the middle of the street and was saved from certain death by a
German Shepard which began humping her leg. It was lucky for both of them
the truck driver loved dogs. He was in too much of a hurry to stop for a
He was reading a Bhuddist text in front of the bank building when
the robbers came out shooting. He closed his eyes, and they were
gone. When he opened them again, he seemed to be in the back of a Police
copyright 2007: john zavacki (the